What Lies Beneath

Every so often comes a cleaning chore that makes us bare our souls, that drives us into the hidden places where we've stuffed photographs and papers and maps, and makes us pull them out. Every so often a cleaning chore comes that makes us ashamed of ourselves.

For me, that one comes today, when the Stainless technicians come to shampoo the carpet.

I am, first of all, ashamed that the carpet is in such bad shape. Copper has grown more anxious as he's gotten older and has developed the habit of scratching rugs when he's upset. His bladder control ain't what it used to be either.

And then there's all the stuff I've been storing on the floor in the bedrooms. This is how I've absorbed the papers and photographs from Mom and Dad's house —by transferring them directly from underneath their beds to underneath mine.

I marvel at how much I can cram into corners and closets — and how easily it slips out of awareness when not in my direct line of vision. But today it's right there, difficult to ignore.

So Stainless Carpet Cleaners will come, and Stainless will clean and Stainless will leave. But the stuff will remain. And dealing with the stuff...  is up to me.